第1998期:找一个怎样的人告别单身?
《单身情歌》里有句歌词:
找一个最爱的深爱的相爱的亲爱的人来告别单身
每个人都渴望被爱,但不是每个人都有幸能找到合适的人来告别单身,注意关键词是“合适”。
话又说回来了,人也不一定非得告别单身,单身“复身”各有利弊,冷暖自知,完全是个人的选择。我不会像川普的副手JD Vance那样说别人是 childless cat ladies — that’s weird:)
人的需求都很复杂,你渴望得到的不一定都是最适合你的。找到一个可爱的人(脾气秉性符合你的习惯),跟你情投意合的人(三观一致,志同道合),一个令你感到自由和放松的人(不猜忌不设防,可以深度畅聊),才是最适合你的,我觉得这才是生活幸福和舒适的基础。
英文里有个词形容这种特质:congenial,意思就是情投意合,我挑选了几个不同字典上对这个词的英文释义,放在一起供你把玩,你看看是否能准确理解这个词:
Cambridge Dictionary: pleasant and friendly; producing a feeling of comfort or satisfaction
Merriam-Webster: pleasant; especially : agreeably suited to one’s nature, tastes, or outlook.
Oxford Dictionary: (of a person) pleasing or liked on account of having qualities or interests that are similar to one’s own.
Collins Dictionary: having a similar disposition, tastes, etc; compatible; sympathetic.
Wikitionary: Having the same or very similar nature, personality, tastes, habits or interests.
最后摘录 vocabulary.com的一段解释总结一下吧:
A congenial person is easy to get along with. If you’re trying to decide which of your friends to take on a road trip, choose the most congenial one. Congenial means sharing the same temperament, or agreeing with your temperament. You can talk about a congenial person, place, or environment.
希望你学会了用congenial这个词,更希望你找到你的 congenial other-half.
学会了congenial,你顺便也可以学会它的反义词 uncongenial,就是跟你情不投意不合,三观抵触处处矛盾的人,志不同道不合,道不同不相为谋的人,对这种人,我劝你早点放手、远离,let them be them, you be you.