第610期：中国式相亲 Chinese blind date
昨天一个年轻同事愁眉不展。我问她放假了不开心吗？她说开心，但是要参加三个同学的婚礼，不开心。
我理解。一个小长假参加三场婚礼的确无法开心。三份礼金之外，还要忍受亲朋好友至少三次逼婚的“好意关心“。
今天我们就来聊聊中国式相亲 – Chinese blind date.
很多人是在当年很流行的英语学习教程《走遍美国》中第一次学到 blind date 这个词的，意思是：
A blind date is a social engagement between two people who have not previously met, usually arranged by a mutual acquaintance.
这是blind date在英语中的本意，就是由男女之间的第一次见面，通常由两人的共同朋友撮合。
这种形式在中国不太一样，一般不是由双方的共同朋友介绍的，而是双方父母或亲戚托人找的。
在网上读到一个作者说：
Let’s be clear, we are not talking about the kind of fun and exciting
blind date arranged by a friend because she knows some cute guy you
might get on with. Oh no. We are considering one of those pitiful and
horrible meetings arranged chiefly by a Chinese family in the hope of
marrying you off.
这段话说的好！中国式相亲的目的不是让你们俩简单地认识一下，而是只有一个目的：marry you off. （把你嫁出去）
以前不是有个电视节目叫“中国式相亲”吗？金星主持的。我看过一次，那哪儿是相亲啊？简直就是工作面试嘛。我觉得那个节目的英文不应该叫Chinese Blind Date，而应该叫Chinese Dating with Parents.
提到相亲这件事，怎能不提著名的上海人民公园相亲角呢？
这个 People’s Park blind date corner 又被称为 The Shanghai Marriage Market. 乖乖，不得了啊。
我们来欣赏一下维基百科对人民公园相亲角的解释，很经典。
The ‘People’s Park blind date corner’is a marriage market held at People’s Park in Shanghai, China.
Parents of unmarried adults flock to the park every Saturday and Sunday from noon to 5 p.m. to trade information on their children.
The primary goal of attending the Shanghai marriage market is for
parents to find a suitable partner for their child.
The standards of
finding the right match may be based upon (but not limited to) age, height, job, income, education, family values, Chinese zodiac sign, and personality.
雨伞上面贴的那些纸上就是老阿姨们的儿子、女儿的简历……
你告诉我，这哪里不像招聘和求职大会？
This kind of blind date is not a real date, but more like a business
meeting. It doesn’t involve any romance—the only goal is marriage. It’s
not about finding a someone you care about or anything resembling love.
Accompanying parents and relatives stifle any potential excitement of
the date and increase any embarrassment and boredom tenfold. （– Tracy Lu, http://www.heredg.com/2016/06/blind-dates/)
中国古代是包办婚姻(arranged marriage)，其实现在这种相亲形式跟包办婚姻本质上没有太大区别。如果你被相亲过，我相信你会有同感。
其实国外也有类似的相亲形式，尤其在美国、加拿大和英国，有一种相亲形式很流行，叫 speed dating 字面意思是“快速约会”，有点像我们熟悉的相亲大会，单位或街道办事处组织的那种。
Usually advance registration is required for speed dating events. Men
and women are rotated to meet each other over a series of short “dates”
usually lasting from three to eight minutes depending on the
organization running the event.
国外的那种“快速约会”中，每对男女交谈三到八分钟，然后主持人示意换人，就这样流动、流水作业，不断跟人交谈。
这跟中国的相亲大会、联谊会的形式和目的差不多。只是，我怎么觉得 something is missing了呢？
亲爱的读者，你觉得 anything missing了吗？
但不论怎样，愿你能找到你爱的人和爱你的人，或者一个人开开心心的就好
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